Wedding Planning

How do I arrange to get married?

You will need to consider the following before commencing the arrangements:-

1. When do you wish to marry?
2. Where do you both live?
3. Where do you wish to marry?

When do you wish to marry?

Before you can marry in Wales or England, you must give notice of your intention to marry to the Superintendent Registrar of the district in which you live or, if you intend marry in a Church in Wales or Church of England church you should have banns read by the vicar. You cannot give notice of your intention to marry to a Superintendent Registrar more than 12 months before your wedding date and usually banns are read within 3 months of a wedding at a church.

However, to arrange a provisional booking, sometimes up to 2 years in advance of the date, you should contact the office of your choice, but you MUST still comply with the legal requirement to give notice in the district or districts where you both live. This must be done no more than twelve months in advance of your wedding. If you have made a provisional booking you should give notice as soon as you legally can.

After you have given notice, you must wait at least 15 days (not including the day of giving notice or the day of issue) before the marriage can take place. You may collect the authorities for the marriage from the district or districts where notice was given as soon as this waiting period is over. The authorities are the legal documents that allow your marriage to take place. You must give the authorities to the Superintendent Registrar of the district where the marriage is to take place. The authorities are valid for twelve months from the date you gave notice.

The only exception to this waiting period of 15 days is where one of the persons getting married is terminally ill. In these circumstances, the marriage can take place very quickly, sometimes on the same day that arrangements have been made. In these circumstances, the marriage may also take place at home, in a hospital or any other place where the party who is terminally ill happens to be.

Where do you both live?

The following conditions apply for the giving of notice:-

You must both have lived in any district in Wales or England for the seven days before you give the notice of marriage. It does not matter if either of you moves to a different address after you have given notice.

If you live in a different district to the person you are marrying , you must give notice at the register office in each district. If you live in the same district, you must each give notice in that district. You must also make arrangements for the date and time of the wedding with the Superintendent Registrar of the district where the marriage is to take place. Civil marriage ceremonies can be solemnised in any register office or approved premise in Wales or England.

The notice is a legal document that must be signed by the people being married, so a friend or relative cannot give notice for you.

There are circumstances where if one party resides in Scotland or Northern Ireland notice of marriage may be given by that party in Scotland or Northern Ireland but please telephone the Superintendent Registrar for further advice of these circumstances.

Similarly, if one party is resident in the Channel Islands, the Isle of Man or a country of the British Commonwealth and is a British subject, special facilities exist for giving notice and the Superintendent Registrar should be contacted for advice.

You will be charged a fee for giving notice. Any register office can tell you the current fee.

Where do you wish to marry?

A civil marriage ceremony can take place in any register office in England or Wales, or at any venue that has been approved to hold a civil marriage.

Such Approved Premises include stately homes and other prestigious buildings, hotels and restaurants.

Click here to search for a location that has been approved by the local authorities to date or to find out how to purchase a hard copy in booklet form.

What documents will I need to show when I give Notice of Marriage?

If you have never held a passport or it is not available for some reason or you do not have a birth certificate or driver's licence we can sometimes accept other forms of identity.

If either of you have married before, whether in this country or abroad, and that marriage ended in divorce, you will need to show proof of your divorce.

If either of you was divorced in Wales or England we will need to see the court-stamped copy of the decree absolute (the final divorce paper). If the divorce took place in a foreign country, we will need to see the original document issued by that country and an English translation if the document is in a foreign language.

If either of you is a widower or widow, we will need to see a certified copy of the death certificate of your late partner issued by the registration authorities of the country where they died.

If either of you is under 18, we will need to see proof that your parents or guardian agree to the marriage. If your parents are divorced we may also need to see the court order that gives custody to one of them.

The Superintendent Registrar will give you advice on this matter.

What will happen on my Wedding Day?

If you are marrying in a register office or approved premise, the registrar will see you both in private before the ceremony. This is to check the details to be entered into the marriage register and to collect the fee. You will each be asked for the following information:

• Your full name, age, occupation and the address of your residence on the day of your marriage.
• The full name and occupation of your father and whether he is retired or deceased.

It is your responsibility to provide two witnesses to the marriage who are usually friends or relatives. They must be able to understand what is taking place and be able to give evidence of what they have seen and heard in the unlikely event that this should become necessary.

One video camera can be used during the ceremony, and one photographer is allowed to take photographs during the ceremony. Time will be given at the end for others to take photographs.

You must agree the form of words to be used, together with any readings or music that is to be included, with the Superintendent Registrar before the day of the wedding.

Once the ceremony is over, the registrar will ask you to check that your details have been correctly entered in the marriage register. Please check them carefully, as there can be problems if errors have to be corrected later. You will then be asked to sign the register. The bride should sign in the name she was known by immediately before the ceremony. Your two witnesses will then be asked to sign, followed by the Superintendent Registrar or Minister who conducted the marriage ceremony and finally the registrar.

Can we renew our marriage vows?

Please Contact us for further infomation or visit.

Do I have to take my husband's name when we marry?

No. Marriage gives you the option of using your husband's name if you wish. However, you may retain your previous name, he may take your name or you may use a combination of both names.

After your wedding, you should inform various authorities that you have married and at that time inform them of the names you will use from that point.

How do I request a replacement marriage certificate?

Complete and return our Online form to request a replacement marriage certificate. Alternatively, you can telephone us for advice.

Christmas Wedding

1. ATTIRE

1.1). Are there any creative accessories, dress styles or colors my bridesmaids can wear for a Christmas Wedding?

Muffs for the bridesmaids can be an alternative to the standard bouquet. Some suggested bridesmaids dress colors are teal, burgundy, deep green, Christmas red, red and green plaids, forest green, gold, silver, cranberry, midnight blue. A long velvet cape with a hood for the bride.

2. MUSIC

2.1) I really want something unique for the music rather than just Christmas carols and music. Any ideas?

• Consider contacting a Choral group in your area. Many groups dress up for the holidays in Dickens -type clothing of the Edwardian/Victorian era and sing authentic carols of that age. This would be a unique musical treat for your guests and would set the mood of the season in a special way.
• A harpist playing Christmas would be lovely
• A children's group singing Christmas songs
• Handbells are another LOVELY additon to any wedding. DON"T USE THEM TO WALK DOWN THE AISLE, as no one will be watching you!!

3. FLOWERS

• Holly, sprigs of ivy and pine
• Caution!: Poinsettias secrete a substance when cut that many people are allergic too. They also should not be placed on the cake (unless candy ones are made) because they are poisonous. If they are to be carried as flowers, gloves or muffs should definitely be planned.
• The fire and ice roses (white with red tips) are very nice, as are gardenias (though they'd be expensive in the winter) and maybe stargazer lilies.
• In corsages and boutonnieres, add mistletoe as an accent.

4. FOOD

4.1). What kind of foods would be appropriate to a Christmas wedding?

Any type of menu is perfectly satisfactory so the issue is more of how to incorporate elements of the holiday season into the menu. Suggestions to consider would be:

• Egg nog
• Hot spiced cider
• Hot chocolate
• Christmas cookies ( gingerbread men, Spritz, bourbon balls, decorated sugar cookies, etc.)
• Sweet breads with whipped toppings (banana, cranberry nut, date nut with cream cheese and butter topping)

4.2) Are there any good ideas for a unique groom's cake?

Use the French Noel Log (Buche de Noel) cake as the groom's cake. (Chocolate - shaped like a log, icing made to look like tree bark).

5. DECORATIONS - CEREMONY

5.1). Can anyone suggest decorations for a Christmas wedding?

• Having a wedding during the Christmas season means that many churches are already decorated for the holidays which is a money saving strategy.
• Clear white electric candles in the windows can be attractive for a night wedding.
• String the bushes in front of the church with tiny white lights.
• Instead of an aisle runner, sprinkle fake snow down the aisle (Heather Thistle)
• In Diane Warner's book, _How to Have a Big Wedding on a Small Budget_, she tells of a wedding two days before Christmas in which the bride had decorated using unsold Christmas trees she had gotten for free from the tree lots. They had decorated the several dozen trees with many strands of white lights and had borrowed every tree stand they could find. The lights were dimmed throughout the wedding and reception making it look like a winter fantasyland.

• Small wreaths
• Florist and party rental places rent a single brass candle on a pole which clamps to the pew. This can be decorated with greenery and bows, then the candles lit just prior to the processional.

6. DECORATIONS - RECEPTION

6.1) How can I decorate my reception hall to reflect a Christmas wedding?

• Large Christmas trees with tiny lights is always attractive. Even ficus trees with white lights are beautiful.
• Stairways can be swagged with greenery roping
• Buffet tables can be swagged with greenery roping along the sides or the greenery roping placed on the table among the platters and dishes. v Buffet tables can also have small white lights along the rim of the table but under the table skirting. Very attractive!
• Doorways and windows can be swagged with greenery roping and roping is cheap (usually $10 for 25 feet)
• 5 candle table candelabras (rented) are very attractive on buffet tables
• Luminaries along the driveway to the reception as well as the walkways are a cheap and attractive decoration.
• Ask each shower guest to give a Christmas ornament (they are out so early these days, it shouldn't be a problem). Then, use these ornaments to decorate a tree at the reception!
• An easy and inexpensive way of decorating the tables at the reception: buy rolls of metallic wrapping paper and bows in your wedding colors and wrap some empty boxes up. You can use the bows and extra wrapping paper for other gifts later.
• We had candy cane balloons done - instead of the heart - you just have both sides of it and separate them - and had them at the entrance of the reception hall. They created a magical setting. I was truly suprised that balloons could be elegant - they really transform a room - Look at florist samples.
• Use clear balloons, not white ones for a wedding. They are etheral and lovely. Solid colors are birthday party stuff.
• Take bridal netting and loop through stairways, garlands, candlelabra garlands, pews, balloon displays and platters or use netting and balloons for table decorations. It is very effective.

7. RECEPTION ACTIVITIES

7.1) We want to have fun at our reception! How can we bring the joy of the season into our reception? Have Santa Claus make a surprise visit. Santas at other Christmas weddings has danced with guests, sat on a chair listening (with microphone from DJ) to what guests want for Christmas, handed out favors from his bag.

• Instead of the traditional bouquet toss, be creative and arrange for a wreath (fabric or real) to be thrown.
• Create a head wreath with mistletoe in it so that singles can wear it during a special dance

8. INVITATIONS/ANNOUNCEMENTS

9. FAVORS

• We decided to get Godiva's gold foil wrapped chocolates. I will wrap them in netting, tie it with gold ribbon and add a small silk poinsettia to each, they look very christmasy.
• Or how about decorating cookie cutters. Little gingerbread men and woman with pink bows.
• And for those serious crafters/bakers - you can make tiny gingerbread cottages out of square or rectangular cookies (like Nice tea biscuits) gumdrops and frosting out of a can. Spray with some kind of shellac if you want to preserve. But make sure everyone knows it, 'specially the kiddies!
• Try making X-mas bells out of communion cups and birdseed. Fill the cup, turn it over onto the netting and tie with a ribbon. Tie two together for a lovely effect of bells.

10. TRANSPORTATION

• If you live somewhere where it snows enough, a horse-drawn sleigh would be fun!

Diamonds

Getting Started

What is the difference between an engagement ring and a wedding band?

The engagement ring is traditionally given by a man to a women to symbolize the intent for marriage. It is usually presented when the man proposes to the woman and is worn throughout the engagement. Traditionally the engagement ring has a single diamond in it. This is called the diamond solitaire. It is not uncommon to see people use a variety of rings as symbols of their engagement. This FAQ deals solely with the purchase of diamonds. Finally, the wedding band is traditionally a gold band with no seams. This continuity is supposed to symbolize the eternal bond of marriage. These are presented to one and other at the wedding ceremony.

Why a diamond?

The diamond being the hardest substance on earth was valued as early as the 15th century. The first diamond engagement ring was given in 1477 by Archduke Maximilian of Austria to Mary of Burgundy. The wedding took place 24 hours later. In these times, diamonds were uncut, so they were valued as a symbol of strength and protection, not beauty. This is where the tradition began.

Why is the wedding ring worn on the 4th finger?

There are two speculated reasons. The rings were actually worn on the thumb in the 17th century, but the 4th finger was used during the ceremony. Some feel that during a Christian wedding, the priest arrives at the 4th finger after touching three fingers on the left hand "In the Name of the Father...Son...and Holy Ghost...". Others believe the Egyptian myth that the ring finger follows the "vena amoris" or vein of love...which supposedly runs directly to the heart.

How do I intelligently shop for diamonds?

Arm yourself with knowledge. Most stones are graded on a set of ratings set forth by the Gemological Institute of America (GIA). Unfortunately, these gradings are often misrepresented by the actual sellers of the diamonds. Essentially, they can give the stones virtually any grading they want, and if the consumer is not educated s/he will not know the difference. Learn the grading scales and look at MANY stones. It is A MUST to find a jeweler that adheres to the GIA standards.

How do I find a reputable jeweler?

Ask around. Find family owned shops that have been around for years. There are some stores that are members of the American Gem Society (AGS). The jewelers at these stores are required by AGS to be tested annually and must uphold certain standards. Most still grade their stones on the GIA scales (AGS does have their own) and adhere strictly to them. It will usually appear as though these stores are charging more for their stones (over mall stores for example), however you are truly getting what you pay for.

Should I buy a loose stone or do I get a better deal buying the whole ring?

This depends on the store. When setting a diamond, it is common (and sensible) to put any defects or "inclusions" under a prong. The problem with buying the whole ring is that the stone cannot be examined out of the setting. Most stores will not charge a setting fee if both the stone and setting are purchased there. Buy the stone loose if you can.

Diamond Shapes

Let's define some terms here:

1. Facet...any of the flat "sides" of the diamond.
2. Table...On a brilliant cut (bc) stone...the top octagonal facet
3. Girdle...The (typically )frosty white ring at the widest part.
4. Culet...The bottom point (actually a facet) on a bc stone
5. Pavilion...The portion of the stone below the girdle
6. Crown...The portion of the stone above the girdle
7. Fire...The quality of the diamond that breaks reflected light into a colorful array.
   
8. Brilliance...The quality of the diamond that reflects light without changing it (sometimes called sparkle).
9. Fluorescence...The characteristic of some diamonds to fluoresce certain colors under some light.
10. Natural...Usually found on the girdle. It is a small section that was on the side of the raw diamond. It appears as a slightly rough flat spot on the girdle.
11. Feather...A jewelers way of saying "crack". Appears as a white feather within the diamond.

                      Table, Facet
                    _______________ 
                   /               \    
                  /                 \  <-----Crown
    Girdle---->  <<<<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>>> 
                  \                 /   
                   \               /    
                    \             /
                     \           /
                      \         / <-----Pavilion
                       \       /
                        \     /
                         \   /
                          \ /
                           *  <------------- Culet
       

Is the shape the the same as the cut?

Sort of. The real "cut" as it is referred to deals with the quality of the final product in terms of its desired shape (for further discussion of cut, see "The 4 C's"). There are essentially 4 common shapes of diamonds: Round (or brilliant), Emerald, Marquis and Pear.

Why do they seem to follow this pattern?

Small rounds are more common, easier to make and sell more quickly than fancies. For larger stones, rounds are in higher demand and the supply is limited. The only exception is the marquis in the larger sizes, which is comparable to or more than the round brilliant

OK, I see all of the terminology...now what is good and what is bad?

The first six terms just describe the geometry of the diamond. Fire and sparkle are both qualities that vary from stone to stone and are affected by the proportions of the diamond. Unfortunately, altering proportions to increase one will likely decrease the other. Look for a good balance of fire and sparkle. Fluorescence occurs naturally and synthetically. It is not common, so jewelers will try to command a higher price. In general it does not change the value of the stone unless it is severe and it *decreases* the value. Severely fluorescent stones often have an oily appearance in sunlight. Naturals if not severe are not bad. Small feathers are common. Any crack that extends more than 1/3 of the way through the stone may cause structural problems.

What shape is best?

That depends on the following:

1. Personal preference
2. Desired brilliance (round brilliant has the most)
3. Weight (Fancies look more elegant in large sizes)
4. How big you want it to look (Fancies tend to look larger)
5. Shape and size of hand (experiment to find what is most flattering)
6. Color and clarity of diamond (round brilliant hides defects and yellow tints best)

What about rings with many small stones? A. Stones less than 0.09ct are often used in these rings. The advantages of the round brilliant cut in this case are (relative to fancies):

1. more brilliance
2. less expensive
3. easier to replace, match and set
4. flaws less visible
5. lower setting cost

Words About Color

What is body color?

This is the amount of yellow or brown tint within the stone, not rare colors that are considered "fancies" (not to be confused with cuts other than the brilliant, which are also referred to as fancies).

How do you judge color?

It is impossible to accurately judge color in a mounted stone. Because of its brilliance, it is best to judge it looking through the pavilion with the table down on a while surface.

What is a Premier?

A premier is a diamond with a yellowish body color that is masked by a strong-blue fluorescence. The diamond will appear whiter than it really is. It will always have an oily or murky appearance in daylight or fluorescent light. This causes a reduction in value.

My ring fluoresces in certain lights...is that ok?

The GIA estimates than 50% of all gem diamonds fluoresce. Blue is the most common. It has no effect on value (contrary to what the jeweler may tell you) unless it causes the stone to appear murky. In that case you should see a reduction in value.

Inclusions

I know that most rings have inclusions, but what is ok and what isn't? Avoid the following flaws:

1. Large milky or cloudy areas
2. Big cracks...they threaten the durability. These include big feathers (big meaning 1/3 the diameter of the stone or more) -Big chips...they'll get bigger
3. Big white, black or colored lines. They reduce brilliance and threaten durability.

Settings

I've found the diamond I want, but I don't like the setting...what should I do?

The setting really compliments the diamond. Make them change it. If they are going to charge you, or won't change it, you probably want to do business with a different store.

Should I buy a 4 or 6 prong setting for my brilliant cut diamond?

This depends on what you like. Smaller stones (<0.5 carat) are greatly affected appearance-wise by the type of setting. Four prongs tend to make make them look more square while 6 prongs cover more of the stone. Six prongs will hold the stone more securely in the event that one fails...and that does happen.

How important is the setting?

Well, like tires to a car, it is the most under-rated part of the whole package. It is the only thing that hangs on to your investment. Cheap settings are made of stamped yellow gold. The more expensive ones are white gold, to die struck white gold and palladium all the way up to platinum. Be sure to find out what the setting is made of and don't be afraid to spend extra on the setting you want.

How long is a setting good for?

It depends on what you do and what the setting is made out of. It is wise to have it inspected annually.

Is my diamond covered under my renter's/homeowner's insurance?

You should check, but probably not. Most policies will allow you to "list" jewelery on a rider for that policy. The cost seems to be about $1.75 per $100 of value.

How to Not Get Ripped Off

How do I know that I'm getting real diamonds?

There are several ways to tell. You can try to scratch it. Diamonds are the hardest material on the planet, so if it is real, it won't scratch. If it is out of the setting, place it table down on newsprint and see if you can read through it. If you can, it is fake. There are other tests that you can ask the jeweler to perform in your presence to verify its authenticity.

I'm getting by diamond inspected/remounted/etc. How can I be sure that they don't switch the stone on me?

Know where the inclusions are on your stone. You can have it certified by the GIA for a fee. They will document the exact location of all identifying inclusions along with color and carat. If you bought a Lazare diamond, know what the serial is.

I asked a jeweler how big a stone was and he mentioned something about spread. What did he mean?

Caveat about size: Always ask how much the stone weighs, not how big it is. There is a term floating around call "spread". The conversation goes something like this:

Customer: What size is that diamond? jeweler: This stone here is very beautiful...you have a good eye! It has a 1 carat spread.

*Note, the customer now thinks the jeweler thinks he/she is dealing with an educated consumer, so he/she can use the terms of the trade without being confusing. The customer does not know the term "spread" and does not ask for fear of losing the image of being educated.

This is what spread is: The spread of the diamond is the weight that an ideally cut stone with the same outer dimension (diameter at the girdle) as the stone in question has. The only stones that have equal weights and spreads are ideally cut stones. Most stones you will find are shallow cut stones. This means the stone is short and fat. This type of cutting allows the stone to appear larger while weighing less. As described before, it affects the brilliance and fire of the stone. A shallow cut stone with a 1 carat spread will weigh less than 1 carat. A deep cut stone with a one carat spread will weigh more than one carat. It is good if the jeweler tells you the weight and the spread as it can help you know if the proportions are close to ideal (the closer the spread and weight are, the better). You just have to watch out for jewelers that try to pawn off the spread as the weight. You can be sure that it is less.

Metals

I. Gold

Why is gold so popular?

It does not corrode, tarnish or rust. It is easy to work with and has an attractive color.

Why is gold alloyed so often?

Mixing gold with other metals makes it harder and cheaper.

What is Karat?

Unlike "carat", karat refers to the purity level of gold. 24K (karat) is pure gold. 18K gold is 75% pure gold and 25% other metals.

Which is better, 14K or 18K gold?

Neither. 18K is more expensive due to its higher gold content. It is also more yellow, but it is softer. 14K holds stones a little better. Ultimately it will be dictated by budget or which you like better appearance-wise.